With all this constant newsroom talk of Leftist politics and Leftist hypocrisy, the only 'Comrade' I can stand these days is a gentleman named Psmith, with a silent 'P'. I'd think Psmith's legendary coolness would be a refreshing change from Comrade Karat's fervent, "if the Centre has any self-respect, it should recall the Ambassador" line.
On second thoughts, Comrade Karat's own inspiration to turn the Left into 'biting dogs' rather than 'barking' ones in recent days must have stemmed from Psmith's gentle explanation in Leave it to Psmith, in which our hero casually explains after pinching an umbrella, "other people merely talk about the redistribution of property; I practise it."!!
Overheard at the CPI headquarters
Indeed, I can see it all in my mind's eye. At the same time as Comrade Karat's above-mentioned epiphany, Comrade Bardhan must have finished Psmith in the City. And much in the manner of our protagonist in his 2nd adventure, called up Comrade Karat to complain about Capitalist Manmohan, "...he always set us down as mere idlers. Triflers. Butterflies. It would be a wholesome corrective for him to watch us perspiring like this in the cause of Communism."*
'Great Scott,' Karat would have said, 'there'll be a row.'
''Some slight temporary breeze, perhaps,' Bardhan would have said. 'Annoying to men of culture and refinement, but not lasting.' And so on and on...The Perfect Solution
Smooth operator though he is, I suspect Comrade Psmith would find the Congress-Left slug fest too distasteful to enter. And although there's an uneasy truce on, everyone (journalists, sources to journalists, bosses, blog pundits) says it's a matter of time before our communist brethren take up the cudgels again. We will then have to turn to the services of that famed troubleshooter Jeeves.
Don't be surprised though, if the Perfect Jeeves Solution to the Left-UPA marital crisis involves a few unexpected engagements (a la Bobbie Wickham or Honoria Glossop), a few maidens pushed into a handy swimming pool and a fearsome aunt or two!
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* all quotes pinched from Psmith in the City and Leave it to Psmith. In the original line, Psmith uses the term commerce instead of communism.
5 comments:
Why not Pranab Mukherjee as Anatole the cook, trying his damnedest to whip up a host of tasty dishes for our discerning comrades.
Manmohan seems more like Lord Emsworth and we all know who the Empress of Blandings is
Ah, but not Psmith, I tell I look around for that fella Jeeves. A most amazing cove, Jeeves. So dashed competent in every respect.
Great piece Venkatesh. Some of my sentences are borrowed, as you can make out, from The Inimitable Jeeves
justdecemberthat - excellent! wonder who empress would of course...
thefatboss - thanks! now if i only knew who you were...
Enjoyed it. Guess you can expand it further. (Been a long time since I last read a PGW. Planning to read all golf-related short stories again because I understand the game better.)
Hi,
Is it banned to call the Left Commies on TV? If not pls address them like that.
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